Attitude Is A Decision...

Progress Pictures....

 92kg - 86.8kg (more muscle too YUM)

117.5kg - 110kg 

Can YOU see the Difference?

New Weeks Are Awesome =)

Back from the doctors, and now awaiting my 3rd lots of bloods results...

I talked to the doctor about everything, and told him about the first text I was sent regarding my 1st bloods and there was a typo, they were at 32, then 85 so now its a waiting game!

Diet was he said I can continue to do what I normally do, just increase the amount a little!

He also said exercise is great for a developing baby so to keep it up!

So now I am making afghans Yum!!

11 days - how slack!

But you will see a fancy new ticker up the top! Now Shhh don't tell anyone haha!

This week, as been a crap... Crap food, Carp decisions, Crap everything!
I really need to get back on track if I want to keep this bubba!

Well  that really is all I have to say atm... Will catch up later!

Paul's Measurements Are Up!!

Paul says:

Its been one of those weeks, been really tired and not sleeping well. Its clearly been shit! But I will get there, I have my beautiful wife to look at for inspiration.

Carrie's Measurements Are In!!!

OMG I have just reached my bust target!!!
105cm loss total 11cm!
I am again fitting my 14DD bras with comfort!

Paul is getting done at lunch LOL...

I only managed to gain 2 cm in waist but I feel thats because my body is re-adjusting from the wicked bitch!

Okay Picture Update!

1/1/2011

Saturday (11/3/2011)

Have I Become Complacent?

I look in the mirror and sigh everyday... I walk past a shop window and sigh...

I use to care what I looked like, I use to take pride in my appearance... I don't think I ever quite knew I had become so complacent in my relief milker/house wife role, until my old friend brought it over salad and coffee at lunch...

"Oh wow, Carrie, you just chucked your hair up and put your sunnies on your head to mask that you haven't even bother brushing it.... and look at what your wearing, 3/4 trackies and an old top..." - Yep I had never noticed, I mean I have been doing that for nearly 3 years... It all started after Paul asked me to marry him... I stopped caring how I looked I had my man!

Lately I have been looking back on my past with Paul, and the rampaging sex life we once had, and the quick fall it had... Round about the time I started gaining weight (not just the depo but the choices I made) and stop presenting myself... I don't blame him... He tells me so much he doesn't care what I look like he still loves me... But I can bet a years wages he does care but loves me too much to tell me!

I mean I no longer work in corporate so I don't care about make up (shit I cant remember the last time I slapped it on!) I chuck on clothes without a thought, I never brush my hair (always a ponytail), I rarely shave haha... and sometimes Paul will pull out the "old" you don't look comfortable in that a.k.a Yeah those pants are WAYYYY to tight! I can't tell you how much my little bubble burst when I hear that...

I know he loves me, but I can't love myself, I *dislike* who I have become, I feel yuck, and lets be serious I need a bloody job (that can't happen til June after we move), I need to be me again... I am tired of Paul, looking at me, and seeing something I don't. I just want him to be sexuality attractive to me again... I want to be attracted to myself! - I mean I can take a photo of myself in a moment of feeling good - see the photo and want to cry, as not even a "my space" photo that gives me the appearance of being sexy/hot/skinny, not such a great feeling... argh help me!

My Theme Song!

I don't know where I'm goin 
but I sure know where I've been 
hanging on the promises in songs of yesterday. 
An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time 
but here I go again, here I go again. 

Tho' I keep searching for an answer 
I never seem to find what I'm looking for. 
Oh Lord, I pray you give me strength to carry on 
'cos I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams. 

Here I go again on my own 
goin' down the only road I've ever known. 
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone. 
An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time. 

Just another heart in need of rescue 
waiting on love's sweet charity 
an' I'm gonna hold on for the rest of my days 
'cos I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams. 

Here I go again on my own 
goin' down the only road I've ever known. 
Like a hobo I was born to walk alone. 
An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time 
but here I go again, here I go again, 
here I go again, here I go. 

An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time. 

Here I go again on my own 
goin' down the only road I've ever known. 
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone 
'cos I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams. 

Here I go again on my own 
goin' down the only road I've ever known. 
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone. 
An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time 
but here I go again, here I go again, 
here I go again, here I go, 
here I go again 

Measurements Are Up!

Introducing "Paul's Shrinking Measurements!" - Also I have updated mine :)

Paul also said he can't believe how much water we are drinking he thinks its funny! I believe I have a weirdo for a husband! Oh and guess what Thrifty has less then 1 calorie - so its favour Yummy!

I'm totally feeling it today!

*The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today
Is Christians who acknowledge Jesus with their lips

Then walk out the door and deny him by their lifestyle.

That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.*

Today I have read the most disgusting lies about a dear friend today... so when I clicked there profile and found out they are Christians, it made me feel for the first time ever to be ashamed to say I am one too...  I just wish I could get up to Auckland to give her the biggest hug... 


Some good news, I have worked off the weekend and I am down to 112.8kgs!
However with that comes the no voice, flu and in pain!


However I just wanted to blog to let my friend know that I LUFF her :)